I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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