i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
