i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
