were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
