need another drink. this is the easiest way
I hate your face
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
