your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
