Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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