My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
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