I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Randomize
