Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
