So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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