Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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