i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize