Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
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