I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize