Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
