Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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