He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
