Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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