i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
