my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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