How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
