He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Fuck appropriateness.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
