when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
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