Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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