my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
