after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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