You smell like stripper and shame
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
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