I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Randomize
