no, he came in my armpit
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
