clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize
