i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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