I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
