Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Randomize
