i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
either way he was missing a nipple.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
