after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
