Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
