you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
