No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
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