Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
