dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
This is my gift to your gina
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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