READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
