dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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