she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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