How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize
