this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
You were trust falling into bushes
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
