ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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