I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
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