I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
