Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
